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History:
I am sitting in a kids camp right now.  I am volunteering at a MISS Foundation Conference in Phoenix this weekend.  These kids have all lost brothers or sisters.  I lost my son four years ago, and almost lost my daughter the same month.  That month, I lost much more than children.  I used to feel like I had total control over my life.  I felt that if I could set my mind to do something, then I could accomplish it.  There was also a large stir up at my job location.  Four areas were combined into one big school.  My job duties changed, my office was taken away and I had a new boss.  This was hard on me too because in my old job, I was pretty much in charge of a program.  I had a large range of skills and my boss trusted me to handle the program without much of his interference.  I had been in that position for over 6 years.  When my job changed, my duties changed and many of the skills I used were taken away from me.  In general, my life really changed.  I realized that I had no control over my life, which really bothered me.  I had immense amounts of anger and frustration.  My daughter was in a car accident where she broke her legs, back, pelvis, ribs and had lost some function in a kidney.  Her brain was bleeding and while in the hospital, she got double pneumonia.  After being in the hospital for almost a month, she finally got sent to my home in a hospital bed.  My son was living at his dad’s house but came over to watch a movie with his sister.  He had to leave before dark to go home to feed his puppy.  He was crossing the street and an 84 year old man ran the red light and hit him.  He died at the scene.  I had to function enough to nurse my daughter back to health but I was running on the emptiest tank possible.  It all seems like a bad dream.  I stayed home from work for almost 4 months. 
When I returned to work, they moved me again to another office and split my duties.  I tried to exercise but my energy level was much lower.  I used to roll out of bed, throw on my exercise clothes and go jogging.  I could run 10Ks.  After all my traumas, I just seemed to have someone else’s body.  It weighed me down like a piece of lead.  The first few days after my son’s death, I couldn’t eat, then someone brought us a wonderful casserole which got me eating again.  Unfortunately, food seem to be a calming force.  I began to gain weight.  Stress seems to take a toll on your skin and hair.  I never used to get tangles in my hair, but now I pull muscles in my neck trying to comb out the tangles.  My skin began to break out like a teen.  I hated to shop for clothes.  I could fit in maternity clothes best.  My stomach seemed to hurt all the time.  I went to doctors for that but after a colonoscopy, they found nothing physical wrong.  I had muscle spasms, headaches and sleepless nights.  After a year of this, I got put on Elavil to help me sleep.  It works but that is a drug that has side effects of course.  It makes my digestion more sluggish and depletes sex drive.  I believe some of my weight gain is attributed to this drug.  I went to chiropractors, acupuncturists and counselors seeking happiness, but they couldn’t imbed their joy of life into me. 

When my job first changed, my former boss retired.  On his exit, he gave the program secretary and myself gift certificates for a spa.  I got on the email list of that spa and got a notice about this makeover show.  I don’t know what truly inspired me to go audition, but I felt it was time to start caring for myself again.  I have been going to meeting where all the parents have lost children.  I see how this type of trauma can really change parents and many of them indicate how they have many physical and emotional problems.  I know how they feel.  One of the main reasons I decided to audition was to show newly bereaved parents that some time in the the future, we can start taking time for ourselves and start to care about our bodies again.  So many parents say how they have no energy, can’t eat right or sleep. 

My family doctor told me that he didn’t want to put me on drugs during that first year.  I was mourning the death of my son and he didn’t want to mask that or delay the pain.  He said it is expected to have sleepless nights, stomach aches and headaches.  Just after 2-3 years, it was time for these symptoms to reduce.  Mine were not reducing.  Many other stressful things were still happening in my life.  My daughter was having many problems and I was fearful for her life.  My mother got sick with cancer and died last year.   Work was changed again, with another new boss and different office.  My life was still out of control.  I want to get that feeling back where I have control.  I want to be healthier and happier.  I don’t want the behaviors of others to totally bring me down.  I want power over my life as I felt I had before. 

This makeover is not just external beauty.  The team is working with me in every aspect.  The team at Macrotherapy have a really good idea.  They tested me with computer sensors to find where my weaknesses are. The exercise program is based on these weaknesses.  The diet plan is designed specially to my needs.  They reviewed lab reports and did a multiple list of additional test to come up with the diet just for me.   They have massage therapists who know where to work.  They were able to get rid of my headache in less than 30 minutes. 

The exercises are more difficult that my previous routine because they developed the program of my needs.  My former routine consisted of what I liked to do.  So I got good at some exercises and I was very weak in other areas.  They found that I was not using my core muscles.  By doing exercises incorrectly or avoiding ones I just didn’t do well, it was not good for me as a whole.  I avoided squats, pushups and the exercise ball.   I never told them this but guess what, those are the exact exercises they are having me do.  Marcotherapy saw that the areas I needed work are the areas I avoided in my old routine.  I worked out every morning before this makeover began but they found muscles to work on that I didn’t know I had.  

The diet is great.  They found that I needed to lower the amount of carbohydrates than I was consuming.  I used to buy fat free everything but they showed me how fat free things contained more sugars which also turned to fat.  I can eat things with good fats, good proteins and low carbs.  I have more energy and feel less bloated.  I have lost six pounds!